Love

Love is a word that is often said but rarely shown. Understandably so, seeing that many people are all talk and no action.  Growing up I was taught that true love is not heard, but felt. As I child I remember seeing my grandmother (RIP) and mother slaving over a stove on holidays simply to see a smile on family members' faces. I remember seeing my father get up at 4 am to get to work early just so he could get off and make it to me and my brother’s athletic events. I remember long drives and in-depth talks with my mother about life and talks with my father about doing what’s right. I remember saying goodnight and kissing my mother and father every night (even days when I had been disciplined or put on punishment). Acts of love like that taught me love is about providing, listening, motivating, being supportive, and being understanding of the ones you care for and treasure.

As I grew older and began to have serious relationships, I realized that not everyone’s definition of love is the same. Due to the way I was raised I have always understood the word “love” isn’t a word that should be thrown around lightly. I never had to find love because I’ve been blessed to always have it.  But for people that haven’t, the thought of loving or being in love is sometimes addictive. Like any addict, once the drug is gone the situation turns from good to bad extremely fast.

During my jog on the treadmill of relationships I had to learn the difference between love and lust. Lust is a powerful, intense, and sometimes blinding feeling. It’s like a gigantic tidal wave from the sea of emotion that forcefully crashes down on the shore of physical attraction, and retracts damn near instantly. See, men are more physical than emotional, and women are normally the opposite. Therefore, intense moments of lust feeds both parties temporary needs and at can be misunderstood as love. I’ve always believed lust lives in the body while love lives in the heart.

Love is not extravagant gifts, high-priced dinners or expensive trips. Now if you are a “ballin” like that and that’s "how you do it”, more power to you, but if that’s what you do a couple times a year, you're not showing love, you’re only trying to cover up for the love you haven’t shown through the normal times. Love is waking up and telling your mate how beautiful they are and how you appreciate them. Love is holding their hand on a long drive, listening to their problems and helping them sort through their day. Love is rubbing their feet after a long day at the office. Love is doing what you can to make their life easier, not because you want the praise of doing it, but because you hope that it will in some way give them relief. If you have someone you love it should be shown 24hrs a day, 7 days a week because we never know when our last moment on this earth will be. As the Bible states, Love is patient, love is kind, it does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud (1 Corinthians 13:4)”. Let the love you have for others be defined by your actions and not words.