The Elevation of Kong

There was a time when I felt my manhood depended on the number of women I had on my list. This list was a mental track record of the women I had been intimate with. For a long time I labeled myself as a player. I was proud of the fact that women loved to give me their bodies. I used to live by Father MC’s quote “treat them like they want to be treated”, and most of the time they treated themselves worse than I ever would.

Time brings understanding, and when you gain that understanding it is your duty to use it in a productive manner. Over time I started to realize that while I thought I was “Playa”, all I was doing is playing myself. See, it took me a while to overstand that when I lay down with someone it is not just a physical act. You share a piece of your spirit every time you lay down with someone, and in turn they share a piece of themselves with you. Honestly I was doing myself a disservice, because most women I encountered were not worthy to indulge in my spirit at all.

Mentally I pimped myself. At times I messed with chicks that were involved and it wouldn’t even phase me. They would lay up with me and do everything under the sun, then go right back to their significant others and act like it never happened. I used to pull pride from that….until it happened to me. Seeing women act in that manner just lowered my respect and trust for them, as well as my respect for myself, and my confidence and respect of relationships as a whole.

At 36 I can say I have finally grown up. I realize “all money aint good money.” I overstand that I am special. I overstand I am worthy of an honest woman…and I am too good to be a dishonest man. I have been blessed by Him whom gives Favor, and for that reason I will not share my body with another woman until I know she has been rightful guided into my life by God. I will abstain until I find my Queen.  Some will think I am crazy, some will understand my pain and where my changes stem from. Some people want to be good…I am striving to be great….mentally, physically, and spiritually.

Kong

When It All Makes Sense

“One day it will all make sense.” I can remember hearing my Nana (RIP) say this to me when I was small. When troubles would come, she would tell me “One day it will all make sense…and when it does…it’s up to you to use that knowledge to help others.” So now it’s starting to make sense.

Everyday God allows this world to test us. Not because He doesn’t care, but you have to overstand that this world we live in is nothing but a constant test and struggle for your spirit and mind. The battle to overcome feelings of Pride, Lust, Gluttony, Greed, Envy, Hate, Sloth and Anger are real.  

Far too many times in life we concentrate on what we are not instead of what we are. We concentrate on what we don’t have instead of what we do have.  When we do this, we give these 7 deadly sins the ability to foster and grow within our spirits. When this occurs we become our own worst enemies, because then not only are we fighting against the issues we are facing, we are fighting against the piece of Him that lives within each one of us.

Over the last 6 years, I have experienced a lot of financial challenges that have left me lacking in material growth. I’ve had many lonely and unrest full nights. Some were spent on the couches of friends, countless hotels and motels, and even in the back of my Chevy. I’ve had to deal with the pain and hate associated with lies and disappointments created by loved ones. Yet through it all I have been blessed with the ability to love and understand what I did have instead of what I didn’t.  I learned to love myself for everything I am despite of what I am not, and most importantly I learned how to listen to the piece of God that lives within me. When this is done there is a joy God gives you that no man, woman, or situation can steal.

At some point in life we have to stop letting life dictate who we are….and let who we are dictate our lives…